I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
