Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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