We won't sleep together?
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I think I am morally bankrupt
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
