How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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