DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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