I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
