yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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