She said her name was "party"
Duck Duck Cougar?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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