then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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