exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize