you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
