i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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