he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
