I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
