My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
