I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
