this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
