let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
