glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
