Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
