Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
