Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You are the jesus of drinking
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
