So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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