exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
