I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
