That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
