I showed him my bush... on skype.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize