He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
