I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
