Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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