I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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