i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
