Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
