I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I wish i was in the wii world.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
