does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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