maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
