I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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