Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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