This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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