okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
not ubering you a puppy
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
