like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
