Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
