Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You're earring is so big in my mouth
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
