you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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