Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
