kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
