Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
