2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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