which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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