hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
